Life

Let’s Begin.

A blank page. A world of possibilities. I have always loved how the first page of a new notebook makes me feel, all the potential it holds.

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However, what usually happens is, I put so much importance on it that I skip over it. I flip a few pages in to start whatever notes, to-do list or miscellaneous thing I need to jot down. I assure myself I will come back to that first page when I have more time, clarity and purpose. Most of the time it never happens. I have notebooks upon notebooks of random different topics, ranging in importance, with no organization at all.  To the annoyance of my husband, even more than notebooks, I have lots of scraps of paper. I find the nearest thing to write on, again thinking that I will come back to it, sort it and write it more neatly in proper notebooks. It is a running joke that I will have written the most important thing on the edge of the back of an envelope, never to be found again.

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All the while I hold to the idea that when inspiration strikes, grab whatever is near, and write! Why waste time looking for something? But now I am turning over a new page in my life. That new page will be the front page. The very first, clean, special page.  No longer will I wait for something better to write, something more important, because now is important. Whatever I am thinking and doing right now, is important! Even if only for that moment, it holds significance in my life. If not, I shouldn’t be writing it.

I realize it comes from a place of perfectionism, one that has been an underlying current in my life that I have only recently become aware of.  I believe lots of people hold themselves back subconsciously waiting for that far off thing, that thing that you just know holds more value than where you are right now.

No more waiting, let’s begin.
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